???????

Life has pretty much the same for the last few months. Just getting fatter and fatter. I'm pretty open about my weight, and let me just say, I'm definitely the fattest I have ever been in my whole life, right at this very moment. And I still have a good 6 weeks left before this baby comes. It doesn't help that all I want to eat is carbs and sugar. And it really doesn't help that I can't really exercise because my tail bone and hips literally feel like they're going to fall apart, so much hurt. Watching me walk is quite entertaining. I'm serious about wanting a wheel chair, which will just aid in my ever growing double chins. I already have a history of huge babies (Rylie was 9 pounds, Davis 8.6 at two weeks early, Liv 6.14 at 3 weeks early, and Jett 5.14 at 6 weeks early) All very big, considering when they were born. So please, keep the donuts away from me. Or don't, I'll just eat them all cuz I do what I want.

This pregnancy is turning out to be so full of mysteries, I don't know how much more uncertainty I can handle. First and foremost, We don't know the gender of the baby, which would have been plenty of mystery for one pregnancy. But the baby is breech and we don't know what will happen. Doc says it has till 37 weeks to turn (I am currently 33 weeks) If  it does not turn, I go into the hospital, get an epidural and they try to turn the baby externally. Which is less than ideal, lots of things can go wrong.  (break your water, pull the placenta away, wrap the cord around babies neck etc.) They do this procedure in the C section room in case they have to cut that baby out in an emergency. If they can't turn the baby, they schedule a C section. So there's that.
(little side note: having a breech baby feels so weird. I'm so used to having my babies kick and bruise my ribs, now he/she kicks straight down, directly on my bladder. I don't know what's worse.)

Then, we are very worried about me going into labor and the baby being born very fast. Each baby of mine has come significantly faster than the last. Jett was born in about 20 minutes. That's from first contraction to baby crying. So I've had a baby with no epidural and I never ever want to do that again.  I mean like, never. If I go into labor and the baby is breech, and it wants to come out before we can get to the hospital (which is a good half hour away) that's super dangerous. I was also group B strep positive with Jett. If thats the case with this one, it can't be born anywhere but a hospital, breech or not.

Soooo.....breech baby....fast labor......group B strep.....boy or girl......c section......????? So many mysteries! I can't even handle it. But you know what? None of it is in my control. So I will just take each day as it comes. If I have to have a C section it will be really hard but not the end of the world. As long as the baby comes out okay and everyone is alive and happy, it will be okay. I've read some bizarre things people do to try and flip breech babies, I'm not about to walk down the stairs on my hands and knees, head first. Or put bags of frozen peas on my tummy to get the baby to turn away from the cold. Or my favorite, have my husband talk loudly at my crotch to get the baby to turn towards daddy's voice. Ahhh, no. So weird.

The rest of this month is jammed packed with Christmas parties and events to keep us beyond busy. I'm counting on that to distract me from all this anxiety. After Christmas is over I'm going to need major support as things will die down, and I'll be left with my mysteries to wait and wait and wait to meet this little bundle!!

I'll end by saying I am just as excited about meeting and cuddling my 5th baby as I was my first......and second, and third, and fourth. It doesn't get old. I just feel more.....experienced. I guess I feel like I know what to freak out about and when to just go with the flow. I'm no pro, but I like to think I know a thing or two about what I'm getting into and the craziness that is about to enclose on my family. I'm so blessed and love this baby to pieces already!!!