And who are you?

I thought I would update on our recent episode to the emergency room. Let me add that I have very little memory of the events so I am writing what people told me happened and the flashes of memory I have from that day...which may or may not be accurate. :) The day started off  pretty normal but I woke up feeling strange. I was having a hard time separating my dreams I had the night before and what was really happening. I felt like I was still dreaming but I knew I wasn't. I was cleaning the kids toys up and all the sudden couldn't remember where I was or what I was doing. I kept trying to ignore what was going on, blaming it on being pregnant or being tired or something. Then I was driving the kids to Michael's work and I was at a light and couldn't remember if I needed to turn right or left...not normal. I couldn't recognise any stores around me, it felt as if I had been dropped in a city that I had never been in and didn't know where I was going. Very strange. I finally made it to his work and we went to lunch. I told him how weird I was feeling and he told me I should probably call my doctor. So on my way I needed to get gas, as I pulled out my wallet and looked at the cards in it I couldn't tell which one was my debit card, I pulled a card out and looked at it and I didn't know what it was. It's very hard to describe, I can only compare it to a dream like mentality, not knowing what was real and what wasn't. When I got home, after getting lost a few more times, I called my nurse and they said to get to the ER as soon as possible because it sounded like I had a stroke. Oooooookaaaay. So I called my neighbors, which I have no recollection of doing and they came over to help with my kids while I waited for Micheal to come get me. I couldn't remember where my baby's room was to tell them where she was sleeping, or what month it was. I remember sitting outside watching Davis paint red paint on the cement and I don't know why I didn't stop him. Now there is permanent red paint on the cement! Anyway, Michael came and got me and we went to the ER. I couldn't answer any of the intake questions or even explain to anyone what was going on. And Michael didn't really know what was going on either, so I'm sure we looked pretty crazy to these doctors. But they could tell by my lack of response and blank stares that something wasn't right. They started right away with blood tests and ordered an MRI to scan my brain. The doctor was giving my brain tests, like asking me questions and I had to remember things he would say, ya, I failed miserably and don't even remember talking to him. Michale informed me of all this. :) So I got the MRI, which is a crazy weird experience, especially when you have no idea whats going on or where you are. Then we waited for the results. The doctor came in and said they didn't find any signs of a stroke or any swelling but they did find scar tissue on both sides of my brain. He asked if I get frequent migraines, and I explained that I did as a side effect of the hormones I was taking. Now I don't remember this conversation but I'm told that he explained that I had a certain type of migraine happening, I don't remember what it was called, you can't feel any pain, but it is effecting in your brain in such a way that it gives you stroke like symptoms and acute amnesia. So basically it's such an intense nerve related condition that it screws with your brain, making you act a little crazy. Which in my opinion, is pretty scary. Good thing my messed up brain didn't tell me to crash my car or tell me to jump off a building so I could fly! Anyway, so that was the diagnosis. The only treatment is blood thinners which you can't be on when you're pregnant so there wasn't really anything they could do. Awesome! They recommended stopping the hormone treatment so the migraines would stop. But stopping the hormones is a risk to the baby. I don't have very much longer of the treatment anyways, but still, stopping early is scary because if something did happen, that would be my fault. They did another ultra sound of the baby and all is well, it was dancing around totally oblivious to the fact that it's mother was completely crazy at the moment. So after a very long day in the hospital we came home and put our kids to bed and I cried of course, out of pure exhaustion, and total uncertainty as to what we were suppose to do. I was able to talk to an OB today and they recommend stopping the hormones as well. But he wasn't my doctor and I want to talk to MY doctor and see what he thinks. But I can't do that until Monday. I tried calling the after hours answering service and demanding that they let me talk to my doctor and they said no, I had to talk to the on call doctor. What. Ever. That lady needed to be punched in the face. So we will be praying about our decision and hopefully be able to make the right one that will help me and the baby. And that's my story of my psychotic episode! I still fell very strange trying to remember what happened, it's like trying to remember a conversation you had in that really strange dream you had two weeks ago. Thats what my brain feels like. I love being a 90 year old woman!